Tuesday 22 September 2009

Cunt Of The Month

Well fuck me, that was a well earned break.

Refreshed, reinvigorated, relaxed and rarin' to go (more like off my tits on something a little stronger than Absynth), it's time for another Elmer's "Cunt of the Month" competition!

This month's candidates are;

1) The Kentish Cuntish wheelclamper who clamped a car (property of disabled Army veteran, Roy Jones) while it was displaying a
valid Disabled badge:

2) The Kentish Cuntish wheelclamper who clamped a car (property of disabled Army veteran, Roy Jones) while it was displaying a valid Disabled badge, then advised Mr Jones he could "
walk home" when Mr Jones stated he was unwilling or unable to pay:

3) The Kentish Cuntish wheelclamper who operates from a PO Box Address who clamped a car (property of disabled Army veteran, Roy Jones) while it was displaying a valid Disabled badge, then advised Mr Jones he could walk home after Mr Jones stated he was unwilling or unable to pay and is now
refusing to refund the charge (which was paid by Mr Jones' son).

So, is the answer Cunt 1, Cunt 2 or Cunt 3?

Answers please, on a postcard to:

Mr Douglas Mooring
Able Securities
PO Box 423
Dover
CT16 9DB

Telephone: 01304 219098

Footnote#1:

According to this
BBC article:

"The company's website says that it holds a Security Industry Authority (SIA) licence... the SIA said a condition of the licence was that clampers should not immobilise a vehicle displaying a valid disabled badge."

"Clamping a car which displays a valid disabled badge breaks the conditions of holding an
SIA licence," said a spokesman.

"We can give warnings or revoke a clamper's licence if we find that this is the case."



"We can give warnings?" Pathetic. This cunt should simply be shot, and dumped on the French side of the Channel.

I do not doubt that there are stout Yeomen of Kent with perhaps a more robust attitude than the mealy-mouthed SIA spokesperson; and meanwhile, what of the PO Box Number behind which the shy proprietor of Able Securities conceals himself;


Oh, look...


Footnote: Oh, and Mr Mooring, if you do happen to read this post, be a love. Refund the money to Mr Jones - it will be money very well spent, I promise you. You utter, weapons-grade cock ring.

1 comment:

Himself said...

Good blog Elmer, I like your style, right up my street.