skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Back in the summer, I posted here what I consider to be the funniest joke in the world.
At the time, I tweaked the HTML settings so that the post font appeared so tiny as to be unreadable.
The only practical way to read it was to copy and paste the text into an editor, and expand the font to taste; I did this to protect the sensibilities of ladies, children, David Duff, and anyone else who might have an axe to grind.
Following a comment from dumkopf** that he was unable to copy and paste the text successfully, and refusing now to defer to all those precious types likely to complain, I reproduce below the world's funniest joke, but this time so that no one reading this page should miss it.
**Actually, the comment from dumkopf is a figleaf. The real reason behind my reposting this is that Beenzzz likes a man who talks / writes dirty. Allegedly.
With thanks to Peter Cook:
There are two guys talking. The first one says:
“You know, the day I met you, I thought you were a cunt. And every time we’ve met since I thought you were a cunt. And it can’t just be me, because everyone who’s ever met you thinks you are a cunt, and probably everyone who will ever meet you will think you’re a cunt. In fact, you’ve got to be the second-biggest cunt in the world.”
The second guy thinks about this for a while.
“So... the day you met me you thought I was a cunt?”
“Yep.”
“And every day since you’ve thought I was a . . .”
“Right.”
“And everyone I’ve ever met thinks I’m a . . .”
“You got it.”
“And everyone I will ever meet will think I’m a . . .”
“Uh-huh.”
“So how comes”, he says, triumphantly, “I’m only the second biggest cunt in the world?”
The first guy looks at him with total contempt. "Because you’re a cunt”, he says.
Mike Mendoza - Bigot
The talkSport radio phone-in host Mike Mendoza has been suspended for 7 days following an investigation by the regulatory body OFCOM, about a remark that he made on air in the context of David Beckham's appeal for information on abducted missing Madeleine McCann.
Introducing his phone-in programme on the day David Beckham appealed for Madeleine's safe return, the DJ said:
"The other thing that has really got up my nose over the last couple of days... are the footballers... and I'm including David Beckham on this one.....to beg whoever has grabbed her, to give her back.
"Now you tell me, paedophiles in general are the type of people that surely would not follow football... not many gay people to the best of my knowledge are great football fans."
In making this statement, Mendoza infers that paedophiles - presumably unlike "ordinary people" - will not only be uninterested in football, but also gay?
This is nothing short of shocking; Mendoza exhibits not only a profound ignorance, but exposes himself as the bigoted, intellectual dwarf that he is.
How dare Mendoza infer that footballers confine their anti-social and criminal conduct while off the pitch only to rape and thuggery?
British soccer - from its grass-roots, all the way to the pinnacle of the Premiership, has both a long and inglorious association with kiddy-fiddling.
While OFCOM released a long-winded press statement both criticizing Mendoza and upholding the numerous single complainants received by them, an anonymous source at the Paedophile Information Exchange was no less circumspect in slating the hapless radio host.
The spokesman said:
"The stigma attached to being called a nonce is bad enough, but for this four-eyed beardie-weirdo to start calling us poofs into the bargain, is a fucking disgrace.
It is not PIE's intention to dignify Mendoza's outrageous slur with any further comment."
